A CRAZY UNCLE’S GUIDE TO BUYING A ROAD BIKE

First of all, you can spend a sh**-ton of money on a road bike and find out that you hate it, or, what is more likely, you just don’t use it enough to justify the expense. Every spring CraigsList is filled with ads of bikes for sale because people swung for the fence in the bike shop the prior year, and just plain don’t ride as much as they thought they would. I love these people because as long as people keep doing this there is an active secondary market for me to pick over. I can’t tell you how many times I have gone riding with someone who spent $2k on a bike, and our ride was only their second or third ride since they got the bike, and they had it for a year or two. I f***ing love to ride! I like the speed of it. I like the alone time. When I am riding with someone, I like the camaraderie. I like taking in the city. I like being out in the country. I like how the world shrinks on a bike. Cycling is my church and I cast out demons on every ride.

One strategy might be to get a starter bike and see if you like it. I’d argue that if you buy a bike and do 2k miles the first year, then it is pretty good proof it wasn’t an impulse buy. I have 4 road bikes now, but I still have my first bike from when I got back into it five years ago. It was a good starter bike, and I still find it fun to ride. You can do that for a year, and sell it on craigslist and probably get 60-70 cents on the dollar and then trade up. I know a stockbroker here in Denver who gets a new bike every three months this way. He just likes to try new bikes. I will tell you about my first bike later but first some basics:

You are basically buying two things when you buy a bike, 1.) the frame, and 2.) the components.

Road bike frames breakdown into the construction material, and the geometry of the frame. I can’t speak super intelligently about the geometry, but I have ridden enough bikes now that I can tell a difference, and I am of the mind I know what I like when I feel it. Geometry affects how power is transferred and the handling of the bike especially in the roll and cornering. My Specialized S-Works was a $9k bike new and that thing feels like a Porsche compared to my Scattante Elite and both are carbon frame bikes.

Most bikes sold in bike shops are either aluminum alloy or carbon. Carbon does a better job absorbing road vibration, but a really good set of tires can go a long way toward that. Aluminum bikes usually have a carbon front fork for the vibration reason, and are usually $500-1000 cheaper than a carbon bike all other things being equal. Less seen on the road is titanium (I have one of those). They are strong, stiff, and light. You can drop those from a plane and the frame will be okay whereas one bad drop of a carbon frame bike and your frame cracks if you hit it just right. Steel is making, or trying to make a comeback. A guy tried to sell me a custom steel bike on the grounds if you had a bad fall, you could bend thr frame back into place, but my thought on that is ‘just don’t fall’. Finally, when you talk about the brand of a bike, what you are really talking about mostly is the frame. All bike makers buy from the same bin of components, but what is most associated with the brand name is the frame, and yes the experience is a mix of hype and reality. There are some good off-brand bikes that are just as good, but don’t have name recognition. Brands I see all the time are:

Specialized (by far the most are these), Trek, Giant, Cannondale, Fuji, and one other I can’t recall that starts with a “P”. I have two Scattante, but they exited the recreational market and only make super-high end bikes anymore. Within these brands are a distribution of models

Before we move on to components, the thing every bike frame or component maker is going to speak to is the weight of the thing they are trying to sell. You can spend hundreds of extra dollars on this thing or that because it is an ounce or two lighter. I don’t get too hung up on that shit. There is nothing more ludicrous than seeing a fat guy in a bike shop arguing over one part being better than another because it is an ounce or two lighter when he is carrying 40-50 extra pounds around. Get in world class shape first and then be an ass about these sorts of things. I am a thick guy. I biked 5100 miles last year. I am one of the fastest 46 year olds you will ever know. If I want to be light on a bike ride, I skip breakfast. I don’t make the bike responsible for me being a fat-ass. 😉

Holding the frame constant, changing the components on a bike can really ratchet the value of the bike up or down. Components include the front and rear derailleurs, the gear cassette in the back, the crank and sprockets in the front, the shifters, and the brakes which are either disk or caliper (disk seems to be on the rise). It is a big subject that is too big to cover here, but the world breaks down into Shimano, SRAM, or Campignolo (which people refer to as ‘Campy’). A bike is usually all one or all the other, and again there is usually a low, medium, and high end of the component at each position I mentioned. So….how many permutations is that? -A crap-ton. Most bikes sold in popular bike shops will have Shimano. Ultegra is the best. Tiagra is the low end. In the middle are 105s, pronounced ‘one-oh-five’. I would suggest going no lower than 105 though I do have one bike with Ultegra stuff in the back and Tiagra in the front. Of these components the derailleurs are the ones you want to pay most attention to. How you can shift will have the most impact on the quality of your ride.

My bike history over the last 5 years:

Scattante R570 – Aluminum alloy frame 105s all around. Great starter bike which I still have. I bought it new for $1200

Galaxy Pro 20 – Aluminum alloy frame Ultegra components. Used this on my first ride down the coast. I gave it to your mother. Off brand bike for about $1000

Scattante Elite – Carbon Frame bike Ultegra back, Tiagra front (sometimes I want to upgrade that). Good general purpose carbon bike. Bought it at the end of the season, marked down from $2200 to $1500 and negotiated another $150 off, and out the door for $1250.

Axium 7 custom titanium – Campy all around. Given to me as by a company director who had a heart condition. Probably $4k new.

Specialized S-Works – Campy all around. Same director gave me this. @$9K new. Seen them sold used online for $3800 and that is a 12 year old bike!!

Budget for other stuff, cuz there are added expenses. For new bikes, the tires will be cheap, and likely last only one year, -Gatorskins @$75-80. The saddle will work through a test period, but if you get serious, you will swap that out @$50. Bikes don’t come with pedals, $70-90, SPD or tri-bolt. Shoes for the pedals @$40 first year test period. I just bought a mid-grade pair for $90. Jersey($40-80 depending on how vain you are). You will want it just for the pockets. Spare tube, pry bars, co2 cartridge, seat mount saddle bag for flats ($45). Floor pump with pressure gauge ($40). Don’t ever head out without pumping your tires up to 100-120 psi. Mark me, you will regret not doing it. Helmet $50-90 (again vanity plays a factor). Bike shorts – I found a brand I really like on Amazon for about $23/pair. Don’t wear underwear under these. You’ll regret it. You are meant to go commando.

So…my first bike the Scattante R570 with all the other stuff? I was out the door and on the road for about $1600. If you really do it like I do, it is worth every penny. I ride almost every day my body and weather allow. Match it up against a health club, and it ain’t that bad. Once you get the bike, flip it over and take a picture of the serial number on the frame. Bikes are one of the most fence-able stolen items there are.

Let me know when you are ready for your first century. Did a 50 mile ride today, and it was beautiful.